Groat in the sack: The keys to Sexcess

Jeff groat [lifestyle bureau chief]

University is an honourable establishment where we come to further our education, stretch our minds and gain those skills that make us employable – oh and we also come to get laid.

It’s September and the hallways and classrooms are buzzing with fresh-faced first years and strung-out third and fourth years on the downward crash of a long, long caffeine buzz, all hoping that they will, in fact, move on to bigger and better things… in bed.

There are enough distractions already facing a university student on an hourly basis like working or finding a job, securing a loan and catching the bus. It can be quite a tough act working a blossoming love life in with a full course-load and two part-time jobs .

But it can all fall into place for a student if they look at things from the proper perspective and looked at through the lens of big “S” Success.

Success in life is often boiled down to a list of vapid maxims coined by some squeaky-clean hack, but really success in the sack is no different from any other professional’s required skill-set.

Here’s what I’ve found works for me:

Time management:
Abstain from alcohol until after doing the deed, minimizing any embarrassing “whisky-dick” moments.
And instead of dirty-talk, bring your notes along and quiz each other.

Networking:
Get out there and mingle, you saucy baby.

Study:
No one likes a fumbling fool.

Passion for going the extra mile:
Sometimes it’s better to give.

Be proactive:
Bring condoms, towels, handcuffs, lube, etc.

Right tools for the job:
You never know ‘til you try it – toys might be the answer to getting things done right.
As well, leave your prejudices at home, Kwantlen is Gay and Lesbian friendly.

Communication skills:
It’s important to be receptive to each other’s wants, needs and desires.

Discipline:
Latex is fun!

(Visited 11 times, 1 visits today)

COMMENTS

facebook comments:

Leave a Reply