GROAT IN THE SACK: TO START - FOREPLAY

Jeff B&W

This is Jeff Groat. He’s the Runner’s sex columnist. He has only one qualification for the job: his last name sounds like a dirty word. That’s good enough for us.

I know, it may be a little disturbing to think of the numerous Twilight vampires necking with zombies, or worse, MJ’s getting fresh with pirates, but who doesn’t enjoy a little roleplaying now and again, even if it involves Michael Jackson?

Okay, bad example. But Halloween brings out the fetishist in all of us, even if it only comes out after a little beer and candy. Everyone is dressed up, some are drinking, some are dancing, some are flirting. One thing leads to another and you wake up next to sexy- Hermione with a pounding headache, and you ask yourself, “Why am I wearing this skirt?”

It’s happened to all of us.
But the real question here is, to foreplay, or not to foreplay?

There are pros and cons to foreplay, no doubt the lines are pretty evenly split, mostly along gender lines.

Guys just want to get down and dirty where girls like to draw things out a bit, take their time and have some fun, whether a costume is involved or not.

It’s something about “bonding,” but I don’t really know.

It’s fair to assume that guys would be doing all the chasing of sweet pirate booty playing hard-to-get, so in some ways, it’s best to play along. Is it worth it?

“Hells, yes,” says student Talysa Dhahan, 18. “It makes things interesting… variety.”

Matt Law, 24, agrees, “It gets both individuals in the game.”
And thus, this is why it’s best not to talk during foreplay.

What’s best here is a little compromise, take your time, guys, and it will pay off. The girls will think you are really sensitive and sweet, and you’ll get some bonus points that don’t really count for anything at all.

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