#RIPAlejandrajonas

By Max Hirtz

Trending Topics, or TTs, are the current most-tweeted phrases or words on Twitter.

Jonas Brothers fans and the almighty Jonas Brothers themselves went apeshit after a young Chilean girl was supposedly found dead after the Chile earthquake wearing a Jonas Brothers T-shirt and holding a Jonas Brothers poster.

Thousands upon thousands of people tweeted about it, thus it appeared on the list of Trending Topics.

I’d say approximately 99 per cent of the tweets came from 12-year-old girls who were mortified when they discovered that one of their fellow fans had perished at such a young age.

Now, 12-year-old Jonas Brothers fans aren’t exactly the sharpest tools in the shed, but you’d think by that age most of them would know how to use Google.

Advice for next time, girlies: If you type in the name of the supposed dead person into Google and absolutely no news articles, photos or Wikipedia pages come up, chances are he or she is alive and well and you just got made.

The other 1 per cent were people who made hilariously crude jokes about the rumoured death that so obviously did not happen.

“I bet that Chilean girl’s neighbors are glad they don’t have to hear her blasting Jonas songs anymore,” tweeted GaryJBusey.

A few days later, to no one’s surprise, it was discovered that the girl didn’t croak after all.

“She is not dead! She is alive!!! AHSUAHSUHSUAHASUHAUSHAUSHAU,” tweeted biaxxblind.