Forging Some Kwantlen Traditions

KPU needs an annual group activity to combat the lack of student life

Kwantlen Polytechnic University has many unique perks which set us apart from other schools. For example, we have campuses in four different locations across three cities, small classroom sizes, and tuitions costs that won’t force you to sell your home. Noticeably absent from the list of things Kwantlenites can boast about, however, is a bustling student life.

One way to remedy the school’s sub-par campus life might be to come up with an annual tradition that students can participate in and be proud of. UBC has their annual “Storm the Wall” obstacle course event, and the University of New Brunswick has their bizarre “Great Pumpkin Sacrifice.” What could KPU’s tradition be?

Foosball Tournament

Perhaps, the most fitting idea is right in front of us. The ceiling of Surrey campus’ cedar building is unusually adorned with gigantic sculptures of foosball figurines. Why foosball? Were Kwantlen’s founding architects trying to tell us something? Hiding a secret, a Da Vinci Code-esque riddle? Is foosball the answer to problems regarding KPU student life?

I’m not one for conspiracy but this choice in décor does seem to suggest something. Perhaps at its inception the founders of KPU had meant the school to become known as an institution dedicated to foosball. The time has come for us to fulfill our destiny. UBC can keep its obstacle course—here at KPU we need to launch a grand student foosball tournament. Who knows, after years and years of possible success, Kwantlen could be one of the reasons why foosball becomes an NCAA sport in the future.

Slip ‘n’ Slide

If foosball doesn’t quite entice the masses then perhaps it’s time for something less-competitive. KPU’s Surrey campus possesses a large plot of land that goes underused by students—the courtyard. This needs to change. With the summer heat making its way into the Lower Mainland, maybe it’s time we use the pond of water as a pool to slip-n-slide in? Just picture the summer heat beaming upon your skin after an arduous three hour lecture. At this point, I can’t think of a better way to cool off than a refreshing dip in a slime-filled pool.

Forest Adventures

Right next to the aforementioned pond lies a sizable forest which could potentially be used for some sort of tradition. With popular nicknames such as “the Whispering Wood” and “the Great Dank Woodland” it doesn’t take much effort to tell what kind of activity students currently use this area for. It’s obvious that a new exercise needs to take place in this wondrous plot of earth—perhaps the school should host an annual paintball tournament in the forest? An overnight camp-out featuring plenty of s’mores?  A tree-climbing contest? The possibilities are endless.

At the end of the day, Kwantlen student life may not necessarily need an annual tradition. However, the school clearly has the resources to create its own unique ritual that students can be proud of. Whether or not students get their foosball tournament or slip-and-slide lies upon the shoulders of Kwantlen’s top brass.

Here’s looking at you, KPU President Alan Davis.