You’d be suprised what floats people’s boats

Mannequins, trees, cannibalism turn you on? You may have a paraphilia, or what we commonly refer to as a fetish. You’re not alone.

By Jared Vaillancourt [Contributor]

So far medical science has identified over 547 “paraphilias”, or sources of sexual arousal from anything other than a consenting adult partner. However, many more are said to exist, with many researchers claiming that anything under the sun (and heck, while we’re at it, the sun too) could be the source of any given person’s interest in sex.
The geeks call these paraphilias, but to common folks like us, they’re “fetishes”.

Fetishes aren’t just about some creepy guys sucking on a lady’s toe. There are strange ones, such as dendrophilia – being turned on by trees – to some that are just plain wrong, like erotophonophilia – arousal via murder – and others still that just seem to have no logical justification, such as narratophilia commonly known as “talking dirty”. While many of these fetishes do indeed arouse the people who suffer – is that the right word? – from them, there’s a lot on the list of paraphilias that are harmful, dangerous and even illegal (pedophilia was listed on there).

Are you a vorarephile? Then you’d like it if someone tried to cannibalize you. Do you get a jolly from being in life-threatening situations? Then you’d fit the bill of an autassassinophiliac. Do you catch yourself staring at those mannequins at the mall? You may just be an agalmatophile.

The list goes on and on.

Now, medical science does claim to have various cures for all sorts of paraphilias – except the ones that are too odd to notice or too extreme to countermand – but, of course, many people who suffer from these fetishes  see no reason to seek medical help at all. It’s not every day you see a lineup of pedophiles at the local pharmacy to get their daily dose of Timmy-Be-Gone, after all. Besides, with some of the more extreme fetishes – I’ll just say vampirism, sadism and autoerotic asphyxiation, to give you an idea – who would want to admit they have a problem? It’d probably mean more jail time than rehab time, and more than likely a total casting out from society.

Unless, of course, that turns them on, too.