Movie review: Obsession

The horrors of modern dating as a woman interested in men can feel like flipping a coin between the two unhealthiest extremes — the arrogant manosphere-oriented, self-proclaimed alpha or the nice guy.

This nice guy character is not a genuinely kind man, but an individual with a subtler sense of entitlement. He aims to manipulate his romantic or sexual relationships through a form of conditional kindness.

Nice guys use self-deprecation in seeking validation. They believe their deepest flaws are being too patient, giving, or available on their dating profiles. They mistake basic manners and friendship as a sign of romantic affection.

Maybe they’re sweet until rejected, and suddenly you’ve led them on and you’re actually “not all that.”

A nice guy isn’t a bad person, but someone who is deeply insecure. This definition absolutely overlaps with the character of Baron “Bear” Bailey in Obsession.

Spoiler warning — all of the trauma and deaths in the film are direct consequences of Bear’s wish for his crush, Nikki Freeman, to love him more than anything in the world after realizing she wasn’t interested.

Love turns into obsession, a rapid mutation into terrifying, possessive, and emotionally-unstable.

Did Bear know his wish would come true and to such extremes? No.

Should he have considered why Genie did not grant wishes making people fall in love in Aladdin? Yes, but that would’ve made for a much shorter film.

I don’t blame Bear for making the wish. If anything, I found it realistic. Haven’t we all felt that same desperation when faced with one-sided love or rejection?

However, Bear becomes irredeemable with how far he’s willing to go to keep Nikki trapped in “her” obsession.

When Nikki begs him to kill her, it’s because she’s an unwilling participant in everything she does, including getting physically romantic with Bear, lying, hurting herself, cooking deceased pet cats, and eventually killing people.

She is completely removed from her life, aspirations, and mind under his wish. To her, the only escape is death, and what is Bear drawn to ask?

“What’s so bad about being with me?”

When he calls the One Wish Willow helpline, Bear does not ask to cancel the wish, but to alter it. Over losing her love and giving back her autonomy, Bear chooses to lessen the intensity of her feelings instead.

That’s like trying to get a full refund on worn shoes and still keep the worn shoes.

Bear never set out to hurt Nikki — they were good friends and confided in one another. But he prioritizes his wants over her right to choose.

Her love is forced, and up until people begin dying, that’s okay. He still has something to gain from her obsession, and that is his own satisfaction — until the fantasy is ruined.

Audiences are obsessing over the film because of how unsettling it is. Such a wild concept is somehow so uncomfortably familiar — the absolute extremes a nice guy would go to finally “win” the girl to reach “his” happy ending.

Many of us have had our own version of Bear, and heard “but he’s so nice, give him a chance!”

But are our feelings simply not enough? Should we force affection to please the nice guy? Obsession unravels these questions, confronting the differences between wanting and demanding to be loved.

Obsession is available to purchase online and the DVD releases on July 14.